tag:ellacaramella.blog.co.uk,2009-11-09:/MokoFeed2009-11-09T05:59:37+01:00tag:ellacaramella.blog.co.uk,2005-11-15:/2005/11/15/stepping_off~309877/ellacaramella2005-11-15T17:00:18+01:002005-11-15T17:00:18+01:00 <p><img src="/img/smilies/grayupset.gif" alt=":##" class="middle" border="0">So…I don’t have really anything to say…in English. Speaking this language makes me feel weird…but still good, though. I am not from here (London) but I feel here like at home, better then in my country. I love multicultural metropolis. I love tiny streets and ugly women.<br> What’s wrong with me? Sitting like this, not having anything to say, anything to click about. I guess our Bridget-Hero always had words to describe her depressions. I am just breathing out and in- probably cause I cant stop.<br> We broke up to days ago, I am so angry at myself – I’ve already managed to tell it to the half of the world- and there is no place for grief anymore. Only emptiness is left.<br> I would love to have a rat. What for am I writing this anyway? I feel like a rat. Closed is cage of reality, fucking grey life, full of an-fucking-pleasant circumstances.<br> I just feel like spinning is shit. Nothing can touch me, nothing wants to. Life is passing me by. I wake up every morning and put my “nine to five” coat, I am tired I want more, but I am so lazy.<br> One and a half year & living together. How did this happen? Am I so uncomplicated. Or is it just my path I have to go thru. Fuck. I am stepping off.</p> <p> <small> <a href="http://ellacaramella.blog.co.uk/2005/11/15/stepping_off~309877/#comments">Comments</a> </small> </p>